One of the Most Disturbing Stories Becomes a Favorite

 You've got to picture the background to understand what this woman was up against.  The Jews were God's Chosen People and they knew it. Most likely the neighbouring 'gentiles' were quite aware of this opinion also. But mother-love surpasses even racial barriers if the mother is desperate enough. This mom sure was. This Canaanite Woman knew Jesus was a teacher and a healer, she probably assumed He was in their country to preach to the Jews living among them but she didn't care. Her daughter was sick, really sick because of a demon that was causing terrific suffering. Jesus could deliver her, she knew it, so she pleads with Him to do so. www.marilynshistoricalnovels.com
Now here comes the puzzling part, not only did Jesus not do it, but He ignored her and later implied that she was a dog. (Probably a common racial slur at the time.)

Why did she persist? Because she saw something the disciples didn't. She saw the love in His eyes, and He saw her faith. He saw a tremendous opportunity to teach those hoity-toity Jews that God loved everyone. So why did she run off to beg the disciples to do something? Maybe she figured Jesus thought it would jeopardize His position if He healed her daughter so out of respect tried to give Him a break. But they weren't helpful so Jesus honoured her request--and her faith. I love it!

Mother

Don't Come into my heart, Lord Jesus

Faced a difficult situation last night. You know what that's like.Someone we love dearly had gotten offended at us and I felt helpless to heal the breach. What, oh what could be done to remedy the situation? With tears and a breaking heart I told my husband it felt like love just wasn't enough when you're raising children. Then they asked us over. It was a tentative step forward on their part, and oh I hated the thought of messing things up by saying or doing the wrong thing. That's when it came to me that I didn't want Jesus in my heart because it was so scrawny and mean and narrow but I wanted to be in His heart so that His love could flow uninhibited right through me.

Please pray for me, for us. 

www.marilynshistoricalnovels.com

A Letter to My Younger Self

Dear Child,

I know what happened; I was there. Your innocent heart was like a rosebud, a pure white flower in a crystal vase. Then an evil hand came and smudged one of the petals. In your innocence, you were soon able to forget and go on with your play.  

You didn’t know this wasn’t normal, you didn’t know this was wrong but you kept it to yourself, why?

Maybe because it made you feel uncomfortable, maybe because you were afraid he would find out and get upset.  But it continued, one petal after another was smudged then crushed until one day the flower withered and died and the water of joy that had been feeding it had also drained away.

As a young child, you soon learned to be afraid of—him. By nature, you would have been carefree, but a shell that some called shyness was developing around you.

Time passed and you gradually became more aware of right and wrong. You saw younger children still carrying the beautiful bud of innocence but yours was gone, faded and dying. It was then you began to realise that the delicate vase that was in your heart had also been crushed and the broken pieces were piercing you, causing much pain.

Is that the end: a broken heart, a dying flower?

It seemed like. In fact, the cuts festered over the years as you learned this was not normal and many were going through life happy because no evil monster had snatched away the flower of innocence and left a broken heart.

By now, those pieces have embedded deep into your heart but you observed others were acting ‘normally’ so pretended to do the same. How can a person be ‘normal’ when the slightest memory brings pain and bad experiences would cause the old wounds to start bleeding away?

How can you go on like this? But you did, year after year, you raised a family, had a caring husband …and prayed…

I keep ‘seeing’ the Great Physician hovering over me while I write; He wants me to remind you how He removed those crushed shards one by one and poured in the healing balm of love.

I know and am grateful for what He has done, but there are

others who are still suffering. Give your heart to Jesus let Him remove the broken pieces. It will not be easy but will sure be a lot easier than having them remain there.
I may have lost that flower of innocence at too young an age but it’s okay, now, because the Great Physician gave me what feels like a Garden of Eden in return

Two Miracles

Anxiety Disorder (An open letter)

MF

Marilyn Friesen

 

|

Today, 8:01 AM

timbrenda@live.ca;

Dear Friend,

This isn’t exactly what you were looking for when you asked for information on how people were dealing with anxiety disorders but I would like to share my experience.

When and how this problem developed I can’t exactly say although I do know that it worsened over the years.

I came from an unhappy and later broken home where the silent treatment was a common method of punishment and I was unable to openly share, and find healing for the sexual abuse that was part of my childhood.

In my middle teens I diligently searched and found a welcome haven among the people of God but that didn’t automatically cure the wounds afflicted in the past.

As time when on God provided me with a loving husband and we raised a family together. The stresses of life increased and I developed various symptoms such as severe dizziness to the point of not being able to attend public meetings. Panic attacks in crowded buildings especially if there were fluorescent lights and lots of activity such as children running around was severely debilitating by this time.

However, my first and foremost desires were to live completely surrendered to God and have Him burn out the dross in my life. By then some of our children had become prodigals, an indirect result of having a mother with a troubled past.

 I told God I would be willing for anything, absolutely anything—even cancer- if my children could be saved.

A couple different people suggested to my husband that we should have a prayer of healing and since our Ministerial Staff was supportive a date was picked.

The day we gathered in the board room at the church is engraved indelibly in my mind. As the meeting proceeded I sensed the warm fellowship and peaceful atmosphere.

By then I was so unwell I could barely even sit up for so long and they wondered if I’d be able to kneel. I wanted to however and with support, managed.

As the prayer proceeded and the oil was poured on my head I felt a burning, but not an uncomfortable sensation in the center of my forehead.

When I stood up the dizziness was gone and within a few weeks the accompanying headaches.  I felt like I was treading on holy ground like I had just partaken of a deeply meaningful Communion. This feeling of awe and holy wonder lingered with me for weeks.

About a month later I was asked to drive a vehicle back from a different province. Although I would be following my husband the whole way it seemed impossible. I never drove anywhere by myself except for short distances and such a long trip was totally unthinkable.

Naturally, my husband was concerned and as we proceeded down the highway he stopped frequently for the first hour or so to ask how I was doing but I was fine.

As the evening came on I was more than fine: there was a glorious sunset and I felt so in tune with God that I sang and prayed with the tears running down my face because I couldn’t praise Him adequately enough. There was no doubt in my mind that I had been healed by the hand of our Almighty God.

As the weeks following unfolded, I saw many little and not so little changes in my life. For example, instead of being so exhausted I’d have to have two or three naps a day, I could get plenty done and even go for a brisk over two-mile walk without any problems.

It was a pleasant surprise to me, and possibly to others to see my personality unfurl. Instead of being caged in by physical and emotional disorders I found myself unselfconsciously joining in conversations and becoming the self that I was always meant to be.

P.S. This is several months later and I still can’t praise Him enough.

Something Supernatural, you're Kidding, Right?

I suppose you are wondering if the euphoria of being healed wore off after a few weeks, maybe even days and I was just my old weary self again. I’m telling you, it was not like that at all. In fact, it just kept getting better and better.

That happened way back in April of this year, the 23 to be exact, and I still can’t praise God enough.

For my quiet time alone with God I enjoy studying various topics but lately I'm having a hard time getting past the praise stage. Oh sure, I’ll throw in a plea or two for some dear one but even that is with a confidence that God is on the giving hand.

Did I tell you about what happened about three weeks ago? I sure should have if I hadn’t. You know, my whole life was identified, mapped out by the plague of dizziness. I couldn’t even drive hardly, and for sure not in the city! Well, our daughter had moved away, but she wanted to sell her car back in Alberta, and that means we, as in Mom and Dad had a great excuse to go visit her, and bring back her car.

Problem is, that meant someone would have to drive one of the vehicles back.

Here’s where Yours Truly was supposed to come in. I solemnly, and repeatedly told my husband I couldn’t do it. For some reason whatever had been going on in my head the last few years caused me to get so extremely sleepy behind the wheel that I didn’t dare drive longer than twenty minutes for fear of not being able to get to the side in time to stop.

But he wanted me to do it, and yes, this was after that All Important day in April. At this time I was still having some trouble with headaches but not vertigo. 

We were already in Saskatchewan when a partial solution came to me.  If we drove at night then the sun wouldn’t be beating in my face all the time making me as drowsy.

Well we left in the late afternoon, and my poor husband was so concerned that he kept stopping to see how I was doing. But I was fine, completely fine!

Oh my, those words don’t cut it at all! We went through miles and miles of prairie, a couple of cities and I just drove on and on and on no trouble at all.

But I’ll tell you a little, no an awesome secret. I wasn’t all alone. It seemed like the whole car was filled with the Presence of God, even the vast Saskatchewan sky was displaying His handiwork in a glorious panorama of evening colors. My heart was overflowing with joy, gratitude and praise and I sang and prayed and sang some more. It was an incredible experience.

We are getting close to the end of June now and my body just keeps getting better and better. Even my personality is improving. (Smile.)

It seems like the real me had been locked up to a large extent in a cage and now it has a chance to truly blossom.

Sure, maybe I am a cheerful person by nature, but in the last few weeks I have been getting down

right bubbly. God is sooo good!

Healing Prayer

Can eight weeks of suffering disappear in one night? Nay, make that eight years, or even two-thirds of a lifetime.

Physically I was never like 'other girls' I was weaker, frailer, and had less stamina. This showed up even as a child, but it wasn't until I was in my twenties, I believe, before the dizzy spells really kicked in. I'm telling you our family doctor tried, he really tried to find the solution for many years but nothing helped.

But the years sped on with migraines, sinus headaches, and the nausea and vertigo that increased intolerably under the slightest stress.

Was I miserable? Yes: and no. God was there. And anywhere with God is a haven of comfort.

My husband had seen me suffering all these years and it became so severe that social settings were becoming intolerable. He got the idea to ask one of the pastor's in our local congregation if they could have a healing prayer for me.  They were open to the idea.

Saturday evening, April 23 has become a holy day in my heart and memories. We are a large congregation so there are two ministers (pastors) and two deacons. We met for a time of Bible reading, fellowship and praying. It was a time of sweet communion as we shared our hearts, confessing our faults one to another. Although the discomfort in my head was so bad at this time, I was willing to go through with it, to see what God could or would do.

We knelt beside our chairs with my dear friend; one of the pastor's wife's, supporting me while her husband anointed my head with oil, and prayed.

Immediately I felt a burning, but not uncomfortable feeling in the center of my forehead which lasted for about a half an hour. Was the dizziness gone? Yes. Was I able to do things what 'normal' people do after that? Absolutely.

I felt like I was treading on Holy Ground, and today which is Tuesday, the wonder, the hallowed feeling is still with me. He Touched Me. The loving Heavenly Father deemed me worthy of a gentle touch of healing and I feel like tiptoeing in His Presence, He was/ is so close.

Healing Love

There is magic in the tenderness

Of a love that sweetly heals
Like a caressing touch it's beauty
O'er my trembling spirit steals.

When my soul lies bruised and crying
Torn by the lash of sin
Love's healing touch is like a balm
That soothes the pain within.

Like the sunlight bursting from the sky
Melting the cold, cold snow,
So healing love's pure magic
Dispels my pain and woe.

Marilyn Friesen

Do you know what I am talking about? Have you experienced it?

Alone and Suffering

This poem is my gift to you  if you feel all alone and as if no one cares.  If you can, print it out and tuck it in a safe place where you can always find it. Contact me if you need someone to talk to.

You are the one

That needs a home

A mother's love

A Daddy's care

You are the one

Who haunts my dreams

Disturbs my sleep

With your sad stare.

You are the one 

Who will be sighing

In some dark place

Alone tonight.

You are the one

I'd love to find

Take to my heart

And hold you tight.

Oh Precious Child

Just pray to God

And trust in Him

I know He cares

Oh Troubled Child

I pray someone 

Will Find you soon

And call you theirs.

A Mother's Sacrifice

Now where did I see that story? It was so beautiful, so touching…so full of mother love that I absolutely wanted to share it with you.

 We are happy to realise that most mothers would be willing to give their all for their children, but fortunately most of us aren't asked to make such great sacrifices.

But one mother was. She rose instantly to the occasion. Now this is where the details become a little blurry in my mind but not enough to make an impact on the story!

They had gone camping, out in the mountains. They had stopped along some little used road to look around at the breathtaking view below and around them. The children soon jumped back into the suburban. The vehicle started rolling. Downwards! The mother saw what was happening! But what could she do? What?! She ran! She threw herself down in front of that heavy van. She felt the impact, but it slowed, it slowed the momentum and it didn't go hurtling into the chasm below.  By then, her husband, who was on the other side of the vehicle managed to leap in and turn it off.

But was she hurt? You better believe it. Did she die? No. Thank God she survived but at a great cost. For years she underwent surgery, therapy and what not all, but was never able to walk again.

Was it worth it? By the light on her face in the picture, and the adoration of the children, she knew it was.

Some of you might find it painful to read a story like this. Your mother never cared. You’re sure your mother never did or would do anything sacrificial for you. Jesus knows that. He knows where you are. But He cares. Here’s a powerful promise. It’s found in the Bible but I’ll put it in my own words.

“Can a mother forget the baby she is nursing? Yes, it could happen, but God will never forget you.” Isaiah 49:15. In another place it says that the hairs on our head are all numbered. I think Jesus mentioned that to show how interested, how He cares about every single detail in our lives.

Maybe your earthly mother and father have left your with an aching void of loneliness in your heart, or maybe you have it in spite of their tender loving care. I didn't

grow up in a happy home either, but since I have been turning to God in my moments of pain and heartache, He has been, is comforting me, and I am finding healing. You can to.

The Mysterious Disease

He held his head high, he was one of the elite, no one would ever find out his secret. His robe was as luxurious, gleaming white as the best. His locks shining like a dark resplendent crown upon his intelligent brow.  As he laughed, joked or discoursed learnedly according to the occasion, his eyes twinkled with life; even they did not give away his deep dark secret.

Festering

Do you remember the story about the boy who owned a pellet gun?

You're Spying On Me!

I suppose a lot of you have listened  to the trailer by now and are wondering when the audio will come out. Well, if you'll stop peering over my shoulder I will let you read some of the editing I was doing this afternoon. 

This is way beyond what you have read last: Jesus is a grown man and teaching the multitudes.

About mid-morning, while we were strolling along through the sunlit countryside, I saw one youngster snatch a fold of His tefilah shawl in his hand, and shout;

“I touched him, now I am a healer, too!” How Yeshua tolerated such nonsense can only be attributed to what a kind hearted Man He is. I am sure He is

tuned to every movement around Him even while teaching.

            This was the same day that He suddenly stopped in His tracks.   Several of the pushier sorts had walked on well ahead of Him before realizing He had stayed in one place.

“Who touched Me?” His voice rang out clearly.

I saw that youngster shrink back behind someone’s skirts, but Yeshua’s

eyes were not searching him out. The talmidim were bewildered that

he would ask a question like that in such a mob,  my curiosity

was aroused.

I caught sight of a stooped little old lady about the

same time Yeshua did. She had such a dazed but radiant look on her

face, I do not think she even noticed that the throng wasn’t milling

around so much anymore. She wasn’t even aware that some folks were

staring at her while others were craning their necks to see why we had

stopped. When she saw that Yeshua wasn’t too busy to give her heed,

she flung herself down at His feet, with tears of joy she babbled her

thanksgiving.

She had been suffering from some kind of bleeding disease; an ulcer

perhaps, and sensed that the moment she had touched His garment

she was well again. Just think,to have been weakened from loss of blood for such a long time, then to feel healthy in a moment. How wonderful that must have been! She was so happy I think many of us basked in her joy, although I did hear mutterings of discontent.

“Daughter,” He said. Although I am sure she was older than I by far it

didn’t seem strange coming from Him, “Your faith made you well; go

in peace, and be healed of your disease.”

By the look on her face I knew she was thinking; all I did

was touch the fringe on His tefilah shawl! I saw rapturous adoration in her eyes

before the crowd once again closed around Him.

https://soundcloud.com/hollywoodbooktrailers/marys-diary-official-book-trailer-by-marilyn-frieson

I WILL. I Will.

My Story?

My Story. Ok, everyone likes a tear jerker now and then. Maybe you won’t cry but I might get a little moist around the eyes just remembering…On the surface I may look like an ordinary Mennonite housewife, clad in dresses and a head covering. So why did I stick my neck out and blog for all those unknown people in the Greater World? To put it simply it’s because I identified with them. And because I identified, I cared, and when one’s heart is moved with compassion, they got to do something about it right? Well, it seems like the only thing I could do that was truly effective was write, so write I did—do. ;^). S’cuse my grammar!

I wasn't always a Mennonite.